Naked Truth

“Let me ask you something, in all the years that you have…undressed in front of a gentleman has he ever asked you to leave? Has he ever walked out and left? No? It’s because he doesn’t care! He’s in a room with a naked girl, he just won the lottery.” -Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

It’s true. As women, we are obsessed with every crease, hair, and things that are never mentioned to even other women. We try and try to be as perfect as possible. We try to live up to images of what other people think is beautiful.

And then they show up.

They get to have back hair. They can be a little thicker around the middle. And we don’t even say anything when they start losing their hair.

Oh yes, ladies. I’m talking about men.

And while it may seem like they get a free pass, they are just as insecure about those things. They just have different ways of dealing with those insecurities. Some men embrace them. Some men decide to change them. And some men just don’t give a shit.

So ladies, embrace yourself. There is no one else in the world that looks like you. Every single inch of you is beautiful. Even with the lights on.

All you need is confidence. I mean, you’ve seen the large guy at the party that has the hottest girlfriend in the room, right? And he’s normally the one with best personality. Take a lesson, everyone. Confidence is sexier than a six-pack.

And guys, if you think I’m letting you get away that easily, you are sadly mistaken. Just because you get us naked doesn’t mean that you nailed it. No pun intended. Take a little advice from Louis C.K.:

“After sex, men just want to lay there, and the woman wants to cuddle. Some men like to make fun of women for that, ‘They always want to cuddle, they’re so needy. Why is she so needy?!’ She’s not needy, you idiot. She’s horny because you did nothing for her. You did absolutely nothing.”

Basically.